I haven't really felt much like writing recently. My life is pretty bad right now and I don't want my blog to be so negative. So I decided to take a break.

Well lately I've really been thinking about alot of things. I just found out my mother has tumors in her mouth and I'm scared. Yes we have our differences and we fight like cats and dogs but deep down I really do love her.

An online friend of mine has been going through some really hard times lately as well. She went through a major surgery and will find out if she has cancer. My soul keeps telling me to reach out to her. Tell her it's going to be ok. That there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

I have asked God to guide my hands to give me the right words to give her his messages. I don't know why I am so pulled to do this.

Another friend has taken a page from my life and has started to blog openly like I do. He says it's all my fault because I have really opened up and let it all hang on the line here. I think it's a good thing to let it out. Otherwise it remains bottled up inside and you either die from eating that poison or you blow-up on the world. I have done both. Let me tell you my blog is one of the healthiest things I have done in my life. I don't even care if anyone reads it. Just knowing it's out of me if fine. :)

Just a little update about the crappy neighbor. Mother came by and started to take pictured of different violations arround the complex. Well this neighbor who has been giving me trouble and who is on the board saw what was going on and decided to call the president of the association and they are going to drop the fine again. I wouldn't fight it if I had done something to deserve it but I haven't done anything to anyone and I have been keeping my back padio as spotless as I can. They know it's harrassment and they know they are headed for a lawsuit so we'll see what happens there.

Well that's all for now except the poem I will be posting at the end of this. I think I am going to start blogging more often. I feel somehow as if the clouds are starting to part and I can see the first rays of the sun shining through. Who knows I'm on muscle relaxers for my bad back at the moment and I'm on a natural high from pulling off Project Birthday. Whatever it is I have had a really wonderful day.

Death Be Not Proud by John Doe

Death, be not proud, though some have called thee
Mighty and dreadful, for thou art not so;
For those whom thou think'st thou dost overthrow,
Die not, poor Death, nor yet canst thou kill me.
From rest and sleep, which but thy pictures be,
Much pleasure; then from thee much more must flow,
And soonest our best men with thee do go,
Rest of their bones, and soul's delivery.
Thou art slave to fate, chance, kings, and desperate men,
And dost with poison, war, and sickness dwell;
And poppy or charms can make us sleep as well
And better than thy stroke; why swell'st thou then?
One short sleep past, we wake eternally,
And death shall be no more; Death, thou shalt die.